MEMORANDUM OPINION AND ORDER
SHADUR, District Judge.
Four motions are currently before this Court in this products liability action by John and James Tarkowski (father and son, singly “John” and “James” and collectively “Tarkowskis”), appearing pro se, against Pennzoil Company and K-Mart Corporation:
1. Tarkowskis’ August 201 motion to review various orders by Magistrate James Balog, including his August 17 discovery rulings;2
2. Tarkowskis’ September 6 petition for rule to show cause why defendants should not be held in contempt of court;
3. defendants’ September 14 motion to dismiss James’s claim for want of prosecution; and
4. Tarkowskis’ October 18 motion for an order to compel defendants to comply with their discovery requests.
For the reasons set forth in this memorandum opinion and order, this Court rules against Tarkowskis on all but the third motion (though it more than gives them the benefit of the doubt by permitting them to prevail on even that issue).
Motion To Review the Magistrate’s Orders
Tarkowskis’ August 20 motion sought review of Magistrate Balog’s August 17 order compelling them to comply with all of defendants’ discovery requests, but declining to order any further compliance by defendants. At that time Tarkowskis’ objections were apparently based in large part on their disagreement with the magistrate’s [39]*39view of the relevance of the materials in question.3
In response defendants’ August 31 cross-motion to strike contended the motion was fatally flawed by two departures from this District Court’s General Rule 2.44 (“Local Rule 2.44”):
1. It was not “effected by the filing of written objections” that “specify the order or part thereof objected to and the basis of the objection.”
2. No copies of the motion were “served on the magistrate.”
On September 26 Tarkowskis replied by broadening the scope of their attack substantially, alleging ten grounds for objection to various rulings of Magistrate Balog. However they did not address defendants’ second procedural point.4
Tarkowskis’ failure to serve the magistrate might of course permit denial of their motion, but this Court is reluctant to impose that result on them.5 Instead it exercises its discretion6 to review the ten contentions in their Sept. 26 Mem. 4-6:
1. Magistrate Balog erroneously refused on August 17 to order defendants to produce the results of certain chemical analyses after having already entered such an order June 27.
2. Magistrate Balog erroneously treated the June 27 ruling as res judicata of Tarkowskis’ August 17 motion to compel, based on a lie by defendants’ counsel.
3. Magistrate Balog’s August 17 discovery order against Tarkowskis violated Rule 23(b) by requiring production of irrelevant material and privileged work product.
4. That same discovery order compelled Tarkowskis to produce materials they had already produced.
5. 6, 7 and 9. Magistrate Balog exceeded his authority (as defined in 28 U.S.C. § 636(b)(1))7 and violated his duty of impartiality when he suggested James’s claim could be dismissed for his failing to appear to represent himself at status calls and motions.
8. Magistrate Balog erroneously refused to appoint counsel to represent the Tarkowskis.
10. Magistrate Balog exceeded his jurisdiction by making rulings on matters other than discovery.
Section 636(b)(1)(A) sets the standard of review of pretrial orders by magis[40]*40trates: It must be shown “that the magistrate’s order is clearly erroneous or contrary to law.” That showing has not been made as to any of the objections:
1 and 2. Tarkowskis say defendants have not complied with the June 27 order; defendants say they have. Neither side has provided this Court with an account of the terms of the June 27 order, and neither has addressed the adequacy of defendants’ interrogatory responses except in a conclusory manner. Thus this Court has the issue before it unadorned with either arguments or proof. Clearly Tarkowskis have not met their burden. But even were that not the case, reversal of Magistrate Balog would not be warranted. He has once ordered defendants to comply, and he cannot be faulted for not reissuing the same order.- If defendants have not in fact complied, Tarkowskis can move before Magistrate Balog for a recommendation as to Rule 37 sanctions for such non-compliance.8
3. Rule 26(b)(1) allows “discovery regarding any matter, not privileged, which is relevant9 to the subject matter involved in the pending action.... ” In response to defendants’ document requests and interrogatories, Tarkowskis contented themselves with bald assertions (wholly without support) of irrelevance and the work product privilege.10 In the face of Tarkowskis’ total failure to follow prescribed procedures or to justify their actions, Magistrate Balog’s order to compel discovery was appropriate.
4. Apparently Tarkowskis object here to the part of the August 17 order compelling them to produce five oil cans, on the ground that they had already produced three of those cans. Such partial production obviously is not a defense to production of the other two, and the objection is overruled.11
5, 6, 7 and 9. Whether James’s claim should be dismissed for want of prosecution will be addressed substantively below. As for the procedural framework, a magistrate cannot himself dismiss a party’s claim (Section 636(b)(1)(A)),12 but he may recommend such dismissal (Section 636(b)(1)(B)). Consequently Magistrate Balog did not exceed his authority or violate his duty of impartiality.
[41]*418. There is no general right to appointed counsel in civil cases. Merritt v. Faulkner, 697 F.2d 761, 763 (7th Cir. 1983).13
10. Magistrate Balog’s only “ruling” that Tarkowskis contend exceeded his authority was his suggestion that defendants move this Court to dismiss James’s claim for want of prosecution. That was not a ruling at all, so no excess of authority could be involved.
Defendants responded to Tarkowskis’ motion for review not only by opposing that motion but also by moving to compel discovery and for an award of expenses and attorney’s fees under Rule 37(a)(4). Tarkowskis undoubtedly are remiss as defendants claim. After being ordered on August 17 to respond to defendants’ discovery requests, they unilaterally decided not to comply until this motion had been disposed of. Such a decision was not for Tarkowskis to make.
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MEMORANDUM OPINION AND ORDER
SHADUR, District Judge.
Four motions are currently before this Court in this products liability action by John and James Tarkowski (father and son, singly “John” and “James” and collectively “Tarkowskis”), appearing pro se, against Pennzoil Company and K-Mart Corporation:
1. Tarkowskis’ August 201 motion to review various orders by Magistrate James Balog, including his August 17 discovery rulings;2
2. Tarkowskis’ September 6 petition for rule to show cause why defendants should not be held in contempt of court;
3. defendants’ September 14 motion to dismiss James’s claim for want of prosecution; and
4. Tarkowskis’ October 18 motion for an order to compel defendants to comply with their discovery requests.
For the reasons set forth in this memorandum opinion and order, this Court rules against Tarkowskis on all but the third motion (though it more than gives them the benefit of the doubt by permitting them to prevail on even that issue).
Motion To Review the Magistrate’s Orders
Tarkowskis’ August 20 motion sought review of Magistrate Balog’s August 17 order compelling them to comply with all of defendants’ discovery requests, but declining to order any further compliance by defendants. At that time Tarkowskis’ objections were apparently based in large part on their disagreement with the magistrate’s [39]*39view of the relevance of the materials in question.3
In response defendants’ August 31 cross-motion to strike contended the motion was fatally flawed by two departures from this District Court’s General Rule 2.44 (“Local Rule 2.44”):
1. It was not “effected by the filing of written objections” that “specify the order or part thereof objected to and the basis of the objection.”
2. No copies of the motion were “served on the magistrate.”
On September 26 Tarkowskis replied by broadening the scope of their attack substantially, alleging ten grounds for objection to various rulings of Magistrate Balog. However they did not address defendants’ second procedural point.4
Tarkowskis’ failure to serve the magistrate might of course permit denial of their motion, but this Court is reluctant to impose that result on them.5 Instead it exercises its discretion6 to review the ten contentions in their Sept. 26 Mem. 4-6:
1. Magistrate Balog erroneously refused on August 17 to order defendants to produce the results of certain chemical analyses after having already entered such an order June 27.
2. Magistrate Balog erroneously treated the June 27 ruling as res judicata of Tarkowskis’ August 17 motion to compel, based on a lie by defendants’ counsel.
3. Magistrate Balog’s August 17 discovery order against Tarkowskis violated Rule 23(b) by requiring production of irrelevant material and privileged work product.
4. That same discovery order compelled Tarkowskis to produce materials they had already produced.
5. 6, 7 and 9. Magistrate Balog exceeded his authority (as defined in 28 U.S.C. § 636(b)(1))7 and violated his duty of impartiality when he suggested James’s claim could be dismissed for his failing to appear to represent himself at status calls and motions.
8. Magistrate Balog erroneously refused to appoint counsel to represent the Tarkowskis.
10. Magistrate Balog exceeded his jurisdiction by making rulings on matters other than discovery.
Section 636(b)(1)(A) sets the standard of review of pretrial orders by magis[40]*40trates: It must be shown “that the magistrate’s order is clearly erroneous or contrary to law.” That showing has not been made as to any of the objections:
1 and 2. Tarkowskis say defendants have not complied with the June 27 order; defendants say they have. Neither side has provided this Court with an account of the terms of the June 27 order, and neither has addressed the adequacy of defendants’ interrogatory responses except in a conclusory manner. Thus this Court has the issue before it unadorned with either arguments or proof. Clearly Tarkowskis have not met their burden. But even were that not the case, reversal of Magistrate Balog would not be warranted. He has once ordered defendants to comply, and he cannot be faulted for not reissuing the same order.- If defendants have not in fact complied, Tarkowskis can move before Magistrate Balog for a recommendation as to Rule 37 sanctions for such non-compliance.8
3. Rule 26(b)(1) allows “discovery regarding any matter, not privileged, which is relevant9 to the subject matter involved in the pending action.... ” In response to defendants’ document requests and interrogatories, Tarkowskis contented themselves with bald assertions (wholly without support) of irrelevance and the work product privilege.10 In the face of Tarkowskis’ total failure to follow prescribed procedures or to justify their actions, Magistrate Balog’s order to compel discovery was appropriate.
4. Apparently Tarkowskis object here to the part of the August 17 order compelling them to produce five oil cans, on the ground that they had already produced three of those cans. Such partial production obviously is not a defense to production of the other two, and the objection is overruled.11
5, 6, 7 and 9. Whether James’s claim should be dismissed for want of prosecution will be addressed substantively below. As for the procedural framework, a magistrate cannot himself dismiss a party’s claim (Section 636(b)(1)(A)),12 but he may recommend such dismissal (Section 636(b)(1)(B)). Consequently Magistrate Balog did not exceed his authority or violate his duty of impartiality.
[41]*418. There is no general right to appointed counsel in civil cases. Merritt v. Faulkner, 697 F.2d 761, 763 (7th Cir. 1983).13
10. Magistrate Balog’s only “ruling” that Tarkowskis contend exceeded his authority was his suggestion that defendants move this Court to dismiss James’s claim for want of prosecution. That was not a ruling at all, so no excess of authority could be involved.
Defendants responded to Tarkowskis’ motion for review not only by opposing that motion but also by moving to compel discovery and for an award of expenses and attorney’s fees under Rule 37(a)(4). Tarkowskis undoubtedly are remiss as defendants claim. After being ordered on August 17 to respond to defendants’ discovery requests, they unilaterally decided not to comply until this motion had been disposed of. Such a decision was not for Tarkowskis to make. Instead they should have moved the magistrate (or even this Court, which would not have held them to the procedural niceties) for a stay of the order pending review. Not having obtained a stay, they are in violation of the August 17 order.
Nonetheless defendants’ Rule 37(a)(4) motion must be denied. All matters concerning discovery, including motions to compel and for Rule 37 sanctions (other than contempt, see Section 636(e)), have been assigned to Magistrate Balog in the first instance. Pendency of Tarkowskis’ motion to review before this Court does not justify defendants in ignoring that line of authority via a cross-motion. They are free, however, to return to the magistrate with the issue.14
This Court recognizes defendants’ cross-motion was likely triggered by frustration at Tarkowskis’ uninformed blunderbuss approach to the Rules. To avoid the future taxation of expenses against them, Tarkowskis should acquaint themselves with the Rules’ discovery scheme. Discovery should occur with considerably less judicial supervision than has been called for here. As already stated in this opinion, the threshold for permissible discovery under the Rules is a low one. Responding to any discovery request with a flat-out objection and refusal to answer is a little like playing Russian roulette, except that the odds against the recalcitrant'player in the discovery game are considerably worse15 (though the risk, a Rule 37(a)(4) sanction, is obviously not as great). And the same is true to an even greater extent in flouting a discovery order, for there the possible sanctions (as in Russian roulette) do extend to fatal ones — see Rule 37(b)(2).
Motion To Have Defendants Held in Contempt of Court
On September 6 Tarkowskis filed a “Petition for Rule To Show Cause” why defendants and their counsel should not be held in contempt of court. Tarkowskis asserted at least eight discernible objections to the behavior of defendants’ counsel, many of which have never been advanced before Magistrate Balog.16 Because all the [42]*42objections pertain to the course of the discovery process, the petition is denied without prejudice to its reassertion in a proper fashion after submission to Magistrate Balog (see for example Section 636(e)).
Motion To Dismiss James’s Claim for Want of Prosecution
At Magistrate Balog’s suggestion defendants have filed a motion to dismiss James’s claim for want of prosecution. James, like his father John, is pursuing this matter pro se. Unlike John, however, James has never appeared for any of the proceedings in the case, including numerous status calls and motion hearings.
Whenever a plaintiff fails to pursue his case, his claim may be dismissed for want of prosecution under Rule 41(b). Here a finding James has not prosecuted his case depends on whether John can represent James’s interests for him (as John proposes to do). If John has not been representing James and cannot represent him in the future, then James’ cause of action may be or become so atrophied by lack of appearances on his behalf that James’s claim must be dismissed with prejudice.
Federal case law is aligned against Tarkowskis on the question whether John can represent James. Our Court of Appeals has held that even in criminal cases, where procedural safeguards for pro se litigants are much stronger than in civil cases, there is no right to be represented by a nonlawyer. United States v. Taylor, 569 F.2d 448, 451 (7th Cir.), cert. denied, 435 U.S. 952, 98 S.Ct. 1581, 55 L.Ed.2d 803 (1978). And in civil actions Guajardo v. Luna, 432 F.2d 1324 (5th Cir.1970) has held a nonlawyer could not file papers on his father’s behalf. Obviously the Guajardo principle must be commutative: It must apply with equal force where, as here, the nonlawyer is a father seeking to represent his son.17
Tarkowskis respond in shotgun fashion, asserting numerous undeveloped arguments in three separate memoranda:
1. Requiring James to appear violates Tarkowskis’ First, Fifth and Ninth Amendment rights (Aug. 20 Mem. 3).
2. Requiring James to be represented by a lawyer rather than a nonlawyer violates state and federal antitrust laws (id. at 3).
3. James is in fact prosecuting the case, for he plans to submit to defendants’ deposition (Sept. 16 Mem. 1).
4. James’s failure to appear during the proceedings does not prejudice defendants (id.).
5. Tarkowskis have been unable to procure an attorney despite reasonable diligence, and James cannot miss work regularly to prosecute his case or he will lose his job. Therefore an adverse ruling on this issue puts James to an unacceptable choice between his case and his job (id. Ex. A at 2-3).
6. Kin are allowed to represent kin under common law (id. Ex. A at 6-7) and Ill.Rev.Stat. ch. 13, § 22 (Sept. 26 Mem. 6).18
Those arguments can be dealt with in brief compass:
[43]*431. There is a First Amendment right to communicate privately about cases, but not to appear in court as a nonlawyer on behalf of another. Storseth v. Spellman, 654 F.2d 1349 (9th Cir.1981); Turner v. American Bar Ass’n, 407 F.Supp. 451, 478-79 (N.D.Tex. et al. 1975), aff’d on the opinion below sub nom. Pilla v. American Bar Ass’n, 542 F.2d 56 (8th Cir.1976). There is no Fifth Amendment right to be represented by a nonlawyer, for the courts have an established interest 19 in limiting civil practice to licensed lawyers and pro se litigants. Finally, the Ninth Amendment assertion is wholly circular, for only if the rule limiting law practice by nonlawyers is itself unconstitutional can the “right” to practice law be said to have been retained by nonlawyers.
2. Limiting the practice of law by nonlawyers does not violate the antitrust laws. Turner, 407 F.Supp. at 479-80.
3. James’s promise to submit to a deposition, without more, does not satisfy his obligation “to prosecute” his claim for Rule 41(b) purposes.
4. No exception to the firm rule against practice of law by a layman permits John to practice law, simply because he says it may not prejudice his opponents. Once again, the restriction is a function of the public interest (not that of the adversary in litigation). Thus the contention — even if true — is irrelevant.
5. In civil litigation — with limited exceptions not applicable here20 — the burden is entirely on the litigants to procure their own lawyers. Tarkowskis’ failure to procure representation is not the responsibility of the legal system. Thus James’s posing of the issue as a forced choice between his job and his cause of action rests on a false premise.
6. In support of their argument that kin may represent kin in lawsuits, Tarkowskis cite four pre-1900 cases that say kin may assist kin in lawsuits. Defendants do not object to John assisting James, only to his representing James. See Storseth, 654 F.2d at 1355 (distinguishing assistance from legal representation). Moreover Ill.Rev.Stat. ch. 13, § 1 clearly prohibits the practice of law without a license. City of Chicago v. Witvoet, 12 Ill.App.3d 654, 299 N.E.2d 128 (1st Dist.1973) holds a husband cannot represent his wife in court — a decision wholly at odds with Tarkowskis’ “kin representing kin” assertion. Tarkowskis’ citation of Ill.Rev.Stat. ch. 13, § 22 is inapposite because that section provides only a limited exception against the crime of “maintenance” — it merely says assisting a kinsman in maintaining a lawsuit is not a crime. It does not authorize the practice of law without a license on behalf of a kinsman.21
Thus Tarkowskis’ position is wholly without warrant in the law. Nonetheless this Court denies the current motion for a dismissal with prejudice of James’s claim. Dismissal with prejudice for want of prosecution is the ultimate sanction, and it should not be resorted to unless lesser sanctions cannot serve the purpose.22
Accordingly this opinion will serve as a caveat for the future. If James persists in his non-appearance despite this fair warn[44]*44ing,23 dismissal of his claim will be reconsidered.
Motion To Compel Defendants To Comply with Discovery
Finally, on October 18 Tarkowskis moved to compel defendants to comply with certain discovery requests. That motion was brought before this Court in the first instance, in direct contravention of the magistrate’s designation to handle all discovery matters in this action.
Consequently Tarkowskis’ motion is denied without any expression on its merits. While no expenses are awarded this time, any attempted repetition will be met not only with a denial but with appropriate sanctions under Rule 37.
Conclusion
This Court adopts and affirms all discovery rulings by Magistrate Balog involved in the current motion. Tarkowskis’ petition for rule to show cause why defendants should not be held in contempt is denied. Defendants’ motion to dismiss James’s cause of action is denied (for the present). Finally, Tarkowskis’ October 18 motion to compel defendants’ compliance with discovery is denied as not now ripe for this Court’s consideration.
As this opinion will make evident, plaintiffs are receiving more than their due — and likely more than is called for by the somewhat preferred status accorded pro se litigants. To add to the problem, defendants have not really done the job of informing this Court on the issues. Accordingly this opinion owes more to this Court’s law clerk, Thomas Shreve, than to the litigants.