In re Marriage of Waller and Kill

CourtCourt of Appeals of Iowa
DecidedMay 7, 2025
Docket24-0266
StatusPublished

This text of In re Marriage of Waller and Kill (In re Marriage of Waller and Kill) is published on Counsel Stack Legal Research, covering Court of Appeals of Iowa primary law. Counsel Stack provides free access to over 12 million legal documents including statutes, case law, regulations, and constitutions.

Bluebook
In re Marriage of Waller and Kill, (iowactapp 2025).

Opinion

IN THE COURT OF APPEALS OF IOWA

No. 24-0266 Filed May 7, 2025

IN RE THE MARRIAGE OF RYAN PAUL WALLER AND SASHA NICHOLE KILL

Upon the Petition of RYAN PAUL WALLER, Petitioner-Appellant,

And Concerning SASHA NICHOLE KILL, Respondent-Appellee. ________________________________________________________________

Appeal from the Iowa District Court for Polk County, Coleman McAllister,

Judge.

Ryan Waller appeals the district court’s decree dissolving the parties’

marriage. AFFIRMED.

Jennifer H. De Kock of Coppola Hockenberg, P.C., West Des Moines, for

appellant.

Anjela A. Shutts and Sydnee M. Waggoner of Whitfield & Eddy, P.L.C., Des

Moines, for appellee.

Considered without oral argument by Tabor, C.J., and Ahlers and

Sandy, JJ. 2

AHLERS, Judge.

Ryan Waller and Sasha Kill married in 2009 and have three minor children

(born in 2008, 2011, and 2015). Ryan petitioned to dissolve the marriage in early

2023. Following a trial, the district court issued a decree dissolving the marriage

and resolving the issues raised by the parties.

Ryan appeals. He contends (1) the court erred in granting Sasha physical

care of the children instead of granting the parents joint physical care; (2) the court

incorrectly determined his income for support purposes; and (3) the court erred in

the amount and duration of spousal support awarded to Sasha. Ryan makes

several additional arguments, but for reasons we will discuss, they are not

preserved for appellate review. Sasha does not cross-appeal, but she seeks an

award of appellate attorney fees from Ryan.

I. Standard of Review

Because dissolution-of-marriage actions are equity actions, we review them

de novo. In re Marriage of Miller, 966 N.W.2d 630, 635 (Iowa 2021). As such, we

give weight to the district court’s fact findings, especially as to witness credibility,

but we are not bound by them. Iowa R. App. P. 6.904(3)(g).

II. Physical Care

Ryan requested the court grant the parties joint physical care of their three

children, while Sasha asked for physical care to be awarded to her. In making

physical-care determinations, our first and governing consideration is the best

interests of the children. Iowa R. App. P. 6.904(3)(n). The main goal in

determining physical care is to place the children in an environment that promotes

the children’s physical health, mental health, and social maturity. In re Marriage 3

of Hansen, 733 N.W.2d 683, 695 (Iowa 2007). When determining whether joint

physical care is in the best interests of a child, courts consider four key,

nonexclusive factors: (1) stability and continuity of caregiving (sometimes referred

to as “approximation” of the historical caregiving arrangement); (2) the parents’

ability to communicate with and show respect to each other; (3) the degree of

conflict between parents; and (4) the degree to which parents agree about their

approach to day-to-day matters. Id. at 696–99. We also consider the factors listed

in Iowa Code section 598.41(3) (2023) and those spelled out in In re Marriage of

Winter, 223 N.W.2d 165, 166–67 (Iowa 1974). In re Marriage of Fennelly, 737

N.W.2d 97, 101 (Iowa 2007).

We start with the approximation factor. The record makes it clear that Ryan

and Sasha love their children deeply and both play an active and important role in

their daily lives. We recognize Ryan’s contributions to the household, both

financially and through his active participation in the children’s extracurricular

activities, as well as his involvement in childcare after school. Ryan works

remotely and has some flexibility to care for the children during work hours, but he

works full-time throughout the week. In contrast, Sasha has operated her own

business since 2012, which has allowed her to set her own hours. This flexibility

has enabled her to take on the responsibilities of scheduling medical

appointments, interacting with teachers, and staying home with the children when

needed. During the summer, Sasha has historically worked fewer hours to

prioritize spending time with the children and avoid the need for a daycare provider.

Both parties are active participants in the children’s lives, but a review of the record

convinces us that Sasha has historically been the primary caregiver—the same 4

conclusion reached by the district court. While this factor weighs in favor of

granting Sasha physical care, it is not a dispositive factor, as we follow a multi-

factored approach. Hansen, 733 N.W.2d at 697.

The next two factors focus on the level of conflict between the parties and

their ability to communicate respectfully with one another. Here, the facts are

somewhat unusual because the parties continued to live in the same house

together with the children while their dissolution action was pending. The parties

essentially divided the house and did their best to stay in their respective areas.

Despite living in the same house, the parties did not have a substantive in-person

conversation for months and instead communicated by text, only as necessary, to

discuss children-related issues. Even with limited text communication, the parties

were frequently unproductive and disrespectful in their exchanges. While the

discord and rancor displayed in those exchanges did not sink to an alarming level,

it sunk low enough to cause the district court concern that the parties did not

“possess the ability to work together to provide for the children’s needs.” The court

observed that their “conflict, acrimony, and tension is much greater than the natural

tension and strain that arises between parties whose relationship is ending and

who are engaged in litigating a custody dispute.” Ultimately, the court concluded

that “[t]he parties’ inability to effectively communicate and to reach consensus on

important decisions about the children does not favor a joint physical care

arrangement.” As the district court had the advantage of seeing the parties

firsthand to gauge the level of discord—an advantage of which we are deprived by

being limited to reviewing the cold transcript—we give these conclusions by the 5

district court considerable weight. As a result, we conclude the second and third

factors cut against a grant of joint physical care.

The fourth factor considers the extent to which parents agree on their

approach to day-to-day matters. We do not expect absolute agreement, but “the

parents must generally be operating from the same page on a wide variety of

routine matters.” Id. at 699. For the majority of their marriage, it appears Sasha

and Ryan were operating from the same page as it relates to the children. For

example, they reached agreements on sleepover and cellphone policies and

shared the same stance on teaching respect and responsibility in their home.

However, the deterioration of their relationship has brought to light several

disagreements that had not been at issue until more recently. Sasha contends the

parties have different parenting styles, and when she tries to correct a child’s

behavior, Ryan either laughs it off or condones the behavior. The parties have

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Related

In Re the Marriage of Winter
223 N.W.2d 165 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 1974)
In Re Marriage of Fennelly & Breckenfelder
737 N.W.2d 97 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 2007)
Meier v. SENECAUT III
641 N.W.2d 532 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 2002)
In Re the Marriage of Hansen
733 N.W.2d 683 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 2007)
In Re the Marriage of Huston
263 N.W.2d 697 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 1978)
In Re Marriage of Burham
283 N.W.2d 269 (Supreme Court of Iowa, 1979)
In Re the Marriage of Huisman
532 N.W.2d 157 (Court of Appeals of Iowa, 1995)

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